But, If You Co Sleep You Can’t Have Sex!!

I don’t know about you but I friggin’ love sleep. And it appears that our baby would only allow us to have sleep if he was nearby. (By nearby, I mean sticking his fingers up my nose and him being sprawled out over me.)

When I was pregnant my mother in law bought us a beautiful co sleeping crib, one of those things that attach to the bed. (I like to call them third wheeling booths!) So, there it was, our lovely new co sleeping crib, we were just so excited for our baby to get here and for him to sleep peacefully in his lovely bed.

HAHA, next joke!

He was born late at night and we didn’t go to sleep until early hours of the morning. We were in hospital as I had an emergency caesarean (but that’s another story!), my partner went home to get a few hours rest before coming in the next morning.

That night, Freddie slept on my chest, I had literally just given birth to him, no way was I going to put him down now after waiting nearly 9 months for him to get here.

The midwives were lovely and kept coming in to check on me just to make sure we were both okay. The first night we came home, we went to bed pretty early and as soon as his head hit the mattress of his lovely new bed he screamed. So that was that. On my chest he went and he stayed on one of our chests for the first 21 nights.

After that I discovered the beauty of breastfeeding whilst lying down. This was the start of good quality sleep! As soon as he stirred I popped my boob in his mouth and back to sleep we went.

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Freddie was 5 months old here. (Please ignore my partner’s armpit, I know it’s hard to!)

 

There’s an awful common misconception that bed sharing will ruin your relationship. Funnily enough, beds are made for sleeping in, and that’s what we do with ours!

Me and my partner have gone through some very rough points in our relationship since having Freddie, but we can safely say that co-sleeping isn’t the reason for that.

(Read about our experience with relationship counselling here)

Now Freddie is older, I feed him to sleep in the early evening, ninja roll out of bed and run out of the room as fast as I can!! Sometimes he will wake up for another feed before we retire to bed but most nights me and my partner get to enjoy quality time together. (Or we did up until the sleep regression entered our lives! Read my post about that here!)

Bed sharing isn’t for everyone, I totally get that. If your baby settles well in their moses basket, crib or cot then co sleeping may not be necessary for you, but for me it has saved my sanity and we had no other choice.

There is another common misconception that once you let your baby sleep in with you, YOU WILL BE DOOMED FOREVER. Now, I may be wrong, but im assuming by the time he’s 18 he won’t still be sleeping in our bed.

In the new year we are planning on buying a single bed for his bedroom. It will be a long and gentle process to get him into his own room but that’s cool with us, rushing him will just make it harder on everyone. I will start off by settling him in his room for naps during the day and then eventually he will start the night off in his own bed. If he wakes up during the night and toddles into our room then that’s fine too.

Basically, if you’re reading this and are contemplating bed sharing for your own sanity then do it. There are plenty of places for you and your partner to have the nookie and your baby certainly won’t be in your bed forever. Here is a link to help you make sure you’re bed sharing in the safest way possible.

If you’re reading this thinking ‘what the hell?’ then that’s fine. We love bed sharing and thanks for your concern but our sex life is fab.

 

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7 thoughts on “But, If You Co Sleep You Can’t Have Sex!!

  1. I really like this post! I am a semi co-sleeper, she sleeps in her cot but spends the second half of the night, after her feed in bed with me. I sort of long for the bed to be 18s only, but on the other hand I totally dread the end of co-sleeping it is so lovely and cosy and special (and easy). X

    Like

  2. I’m exactly the same
    As myfoodbaby, a semi co sleeper. Rory sleeps in her Moses basket for the first part of the night which is usually from around 12 – 5ish and then she ends up in the bed with me after her feed and I love it! It’s such a lovely feeling having your child get comfort from you being around and I don’t worry at all that she will be stuck in our bed for years.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This sounds very much like our sleeping arrangement. Linc just turned 1 and he has no intention of leaving our bed; I figure eventually he’ll want his own space, but for breastfeeding and much needed sleep, it saved me completely.

    Liked by 1 person

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