Why I’m Passionate About Gentle Parenting

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I’m passionate about children being set boundaries without being scared that if they mess up they will get threatened or smacked.

I’m passionate about parents using their instincts, if more parents used their instincts then less children would be physically and emotionally punished.

Click here to read Why Do We Dislike Babies?

I’m passionate about advocating babies and children’s human rights. (yes, smacking them and leaving them to cry are ignoring their human rights.)

I’m passionate about helping mums who are struggling. It’s okay to mess up sometimes, and it’s okay for your child to witness it; we are only human.

I’m passionate about providing new mums with correct information about breastfeeding.

Click here to read 10 Reasons To Breastfeed

I’m passionate about loving our children, putting them first, they are the future of our world.

I’m passionate about putting an end to neglectful parenting such as smacking and Cry-It-Out, their future is in our hands and if we don’t love them unconditionally and treat them with respect then they won’t treat anyone with respect.

I’m passionate about being a role model to children. Children copy adults, if they see us smacking and hurting others then they will think it’s okay. If they see us being mean to one another then they will think it’s okay.

I’m passionate about getting rid of these hypocrisy so called parenting methods. There is nothing okay about using physical violence and emotional violence to punish someone for doing something ‘wrong’. It’s hypocritical and confusing.

I’m passionate about spreading factual information instead of people using anecdotal evidence. You may have turned out ‘fine’, but many many people haven’t and many many children won’t.

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69 thoughts on “Why I’m Passionate About Gentle Parenting

  1. i’m loving reading your parenting posts. I love your philosophy it is so similar to mine and I agree smacking and cry it out are not nice methods! A fab post. Angela

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  2. Its very hard to change the habits from being brought up this way, I try my hardest to be a good mum and promote these things. Hypocrisy is something I cannot stand, how can they ever learn to be a good and happy individual when they learn by example.

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  3. Well said! So often do I hear “he just gets so angry and lashes out”, there’s a reason why they’re doing those behaviours, they’re seeing them and repeating them or using their pent up emotions to bid for attention.
    Brilliant post, I hope more people see it, will definitely be sharing! x

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  4. I find it hard not to judge other parents but you shouldn’t force you own parenting styles on others as a lot depends on social factors and how they were raised themselves. I do things very differently to my parents and how I was raised and they don’t like it. Education and not preaching is key!

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    • Yes I completely agree with you; we all remember that angry teacher at school, did we learn anything from that teacher? No, we hated them! So we must be gentle and try and put ourselves in their shoes x

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    • I totally agree with you Kara on the not preaching. I find this quite judgemental. Ok, smacking is wrong, we all know that. However this suggests that anyone who doesn’t do gentle parenting is wrong. They might not be wrong, they might be doing what has been advised, they might have tried every other method and not got there so trying something else as a last resort.

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  5. I think parenting is one of the most hardest things that we will do in our lifetime, but it’s also the best thing that will happen to use for sure! I love all your points and completely agree!

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  6. Have to say my parents used the exact opposite approach to parenting me and I grew up hating them and had nothing to do with them for years before they died. I truly do not believe you can “spoil a baby” by lifting them when they cry, but can do huge amounts of harm by not lifting them. Nice food for thought.

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  7. That was beautiful. I love that your passion is with gentle parenting, because there are very few parents who are. Thank you for being against abuse, you are one of the rare people that make this world a better place.

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  8. To each his/her own. I was raised by an abusive mother and as such tried my best to respect my daughter and lovingly raised her as best as I knew. Having said that and while I agree in principle with much of what you have said, i have to be honest and say that I cannot agree 100% – but again, to each his own. Namaste.

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  9. Sounds like you’re passionate ;-). I’m not a parent yet, but I’m watching many of my friends try to figure out how to get a sleep routine with their kids. Sounds like the doctors here in the states say to not let your child cry more than an hour, but to let them cry until that point. Obviously, this does not apply to newborns. So this debate is a very interesting one. I know my parents ended up letting me cry a little when I was around 6 months- I don’t call that abuse. But I admire your passion, and have a lot of research to do regarding sleep training.

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  10. Gentle parenting is for me too. My mother said I couldn’t be friends with my child, that I had to establish who was boss with him, I hate that. Just because he’s my son doesn’t mean I cant be respectful to him. Crying it out is horrible, I don’t understand why any parent would want to do that.

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  11. Children are a gift. Different people have varying ways of parenting, but I think God knows what each child needs to become and fulfill their purpose on this earth. I agree no child should ever be abused. Such innocence should be treasured.

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  12. I love how you think. It is way to often that parents listen to other parent instead of just using instincts. I do believe it is important to show our kids that we to are indeed human and do make mistakes sometimes. All to often there are them parents that don’t show their children that there is nothing wrong with making mistakes.

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  13. I might get lynched for this, but while I agree about the no smacking part (although I admit I have given a sharp tap to my son’s leg twice), I find this post judgemental of parents who don’t do things the way you do. There are lots of parenting styles, different cultures, and very good parents might have got advice from other experts, proven methods and may have tried every other method but be at the end of the line for things to try.

    I’m not saying smacking is good, but letting an older baby/toddler cry for a bit if you’ve already fed, soothed, been in to them, talked to them etc, is not imo going to damage them. Often they’re having a moan, and I certainly knew when my son was having a moan rather than in pain, hungry, thirsty, needing a nappy change etc. Ok, he was a good sleeper, and he wasn’t getting himself worked up, so it didn’t happen often, but he calmed down before falling asleep so wasn’t crying himself to sleep. He’d realised that he didn’t need to cry any more. He’s a really cheery little boy and always has been, but sometimes, children do need a firmer word and explanation of why you’re asking them to do something or not.

    I think as long as you’re trying to communicate with them in a suitable listening manner, that’s the number 1 thing to having happy children and confident adults.

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  14. Am totally with you on this, I would never use physical punishments and always try to have a discussion rather than dictate. Tho I have to own up to occasional lapses of temper where I end up shouting – usually when we are pushed for time before school – always feel terrible afterwards and it never achieves anything – still, we are all human and sometimes our buttons just get pushed too far!

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  15. Lovely post and I agree with everything you say. Parenting can be a minefield sometimes! Although I have to say I disagree with a previous commenter with the comment ‘a child lashing out must have witnessed this behaviour’ – not always. My baby is only 16 month old and has just recently started lashing out. He has NEVER seen any such behaviour. I have a degree in child psychology so understand its an inbuilt reaction to not being able to communicate his feelings properly. Another great post hun!

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  16. Yes yes yes! I was very lucky in that my parents took the gentle parent approach and so I have great role models when it comes to knowing how I wish to parent Aidan. I hate when people say things like ‘it never done me any harm’ – that’s great for you but sadly it does do great harm to so many others. Great post!

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  17. It is so easy to say this – but t times not so easy to do. I have been a mum for almost 20 years, with 4 children and have seen parenting change over the years. I never ever smack my children, or use any other physical punishment, but use my judgement, and gut feeling to be the best mum I can. Seeing my eldest blossoming in Uni, and being so close – and great friends too, I am reassured I have (most of the time) got it right. Kaz x

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  18. I love this and I agree with it for the most part. Obviously some things I may not completely agree with, but the general thought behind it…yes. Thank you for sharing

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I grew up in a house where force was the preferred method of parenting. Yelling, excessive spankings, and the inability to express my emotions really damaged me. I was brought up this way, I hate it, and I told myself I would be different for my children. Sometimes I find myself frustrated! Sometimes I catch it and back off to give myself some time to calm my anxiety but other times I just react. I hate spanking and don’t really see the benefit of using that as a way to change their minds about what they are feeling and doing. If I happen to mess up, I try to explain to them later that I am sorry for being so upset. Letting my kids cry it out, even if it’s a tantrum, ALWAYS puts me on the verge of tears.

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  20. I love this and agree with every word. My issue (for want of a better word) is that so often people seem to think that gentle parenting means a child has no boundaries when in fact the opposite is true. My son is 5.5 and just recently has stopped coming into bed with me and the husband at night and just this week we were saying to each other how much we missed it! I feel so sad that period is over now.

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